The Walking Job Seeker

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Do you feel like you’re wandering through a wasteland of desperate survival tactics, fending off snarling, insatiable job hunters at every turn? Such is the plight of today’s job seeker, bravely attempting to navigate the ups and downs of a turbulent economy, and even more turbulent employment outlook.

In many ways, we are beholden to look at our brave new world in a different light. We must be vigilant and determined. Focused yet flexible. Poised to take on new challenges in a fluid, continuously-changing landscape. In short, much like the fictional characters of a post-apocalyptic world seeking the proverbial new beginning, we too must seek new beginnings in the workplace. Holding on to the dream of an idyllic profession – and workplace – can seem daunting, to say the least. It is a task only the most hearty will survive.

On that note, do you feel like you are one of the lost souls of the new economy? Or a figure of hero-esque magnitude? Leaping and bounding ahead of your competition through seemingly cataclysmic obstacles?

Answer the following to get a beat on where you stand.

A friend tells you the job he/she recommended you for, sadly, has been filled. Not by you. You:

  1. Head for the nearest bar/all-you-can-eat joint and make like a plough
  2. Consider the merits of selling sandals and sea shell necklaces on the white sand beaches of (insert island name here)
  3. Position your thinking to assume said successful candidate will invariably botch up the job, fortuitously positioning you as the second strongest choice

An online social networking job posting has now closed. To your horror, you realize that have not been contacted. You:

  1. Take down your profile in a fit of passive-aggressive, self-righteous rage, vowing that one day you will “smite all who have crossed you in your job search!”
  2. Vet and compile a list of suspiciously successful candidates, submitting their names to zealous telemarketing outfits
  3. Meticulously audit your profile: resume, cover letter, social networking profiles etc., ensuring that you are the man left standing in the next round

After two confident interviews with the higher ups of a potential employer, you are informed you are not the successful candidate for the position. You:

  1. Run an ad in the local newspaper that reads: Employee available for well-educated, astute employers who succeed in making winning hiring decisions. Managers and human resources professionals who are able to recognize superior individuals need only apply
  2. Bill said employer for gas expense to and from the interview(s)
  3. Contact said employer and politely inquire as to the reasons for passing you over. From there, make a plan going forward that incorporates lessons learned

How did you do?

Are you a picture of resilience and fortitude in your quest for new and exciting employment opportunities? Or, ahem, otherwise? 🙂

By | 2016-12-01T07:03:22+00:00 August 2nd, 2016|BLOG|0 Comments

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